The Faces of Loss in Depression by John Thurman
One of the common reasons for depression is loss. It may be loss of a relationship, loss of a job, loss or a child, a life transition or loss of self esteem. These losses if not managed and addressed can impact the brain’s ability to, think clearly and can lead a person into a chemical imbalance in their brain that can lead to depression.
Just a little reality note, sadness and loss are part of living! In reading the Old and New Testament we can study how to deal with loss, both in healthy and unhealthy ways.
Researchers tell us there are three types of loss.
The first type of loss is concrete. A concrete loss is one that you can put on your calendar. One x date this loss occurred. The good thing about a concrete loss is one it is identified, over time; it can be grieved and processed.
Example: When I was around six or seven I remember my pet puppy being hit by a car. It was a tough experience, but one I got over.
The second type of grief is abstract. An abstract loss is always related to a concrete loss but is a little more difficult to identify and process.
Example: Shortly after my puppy died, I wondered if I could ever handle having another puppy. My parents, being wise, obtained another puppy and I have been a dog person all of my life.
The third type of loss, which is the toughest to overcome; because it is not connected to the concrete loss is imagined loss. Imagined losses are all the ‘what ifs,’ and the ‘I’ll never.’ The difficulty with this type of loss is that there is no getting over it, because it does not have a base in reality. It is this type of loss that can ultimately send a person into a depression.
As a person learns to deal with loss it is important to be able to sort out they types of losses they are experiencing. The goal is to locate the concrete and abstract losses and begin to grieve them. When you find an imagined loss minimize the time you spend on it, as there is little profit in dealing with it.
If you need help, talk with your pastor, a trusted friend or a counselor.
(c) 2007 John Thurman
